As a life ling swimmer/coach I can tell you this is not as surprising as it sounds. The last time the Chinese made headlines in swimming it was because Sun Yang’s mother ordered blood vials be destroyed before they could be tested, which we all know is incredibly innocent behavior.

The IOC should start branding their own performance-enhancing drugs for sale to participants and the audience, then only allow athletes to compete if they test positive for IOC-brand Olympiroids.

What, don’t tell me you think the IOC is too ethical to let this happen.