Good morning, you miserable fucks. Rise and shine, it’s another glorious day in the United States of America, and your beloved Governor Chris MOTHER FUCKIN’ Christopher Christie is ready to kick some ass and take names.

While you were all sleeping like lazy sacks of shit, I was up at the crack of dawn, pounding back espressos and plotting my next move to make this country great again.

So wipe the sleep from your eyes, pull your heads out of your asses, and get ready to face the day.

And remember, if you’re not living life to the fullest and enjoying every goddamn moment, then you’re doing it wrong.

Now go out there and make something of yourselves, you worthless pieces of shit.

#MorningMotivation #WakeTheFuckUp #ChristieKnowsBest