And we will absolutely, positively never know.
Well, not with that attitude.
We?
In mother Russia, poop does you!
Or it could kill you
Excited DIYers running out before doing research: please note that in a medical setting something like half of potential donor poops wind up rejected because of unsuitable bacteria living in the gut that could make you sick.
“What do you do for a living?”
“My poops are the right kind of poops. So doctors pay me to take my poops so others can eat them.”
“…what?”
“They’re the best poops. Really, I don’t know anyone who has poops as good as me. And all the people, all the doctors, the committees, everyone agrees, everyone knows, my poops are the best. The best for me, the best for America.”
Yup, see also the specimen preparation section of the linked Wikipedia article
This gonna be your super hero origin story?
Shitman
Oh shit man!
Public Restroom Unflushed Poop Man
It also might have tapeworms.
Or a few hundred other nasty things
Poseidon’s Kiss might have healing powers if you’re lucky.
The IRL holy grail is a toilet.
Drink from the wrong one and you forfeit your life in the most horrid of ways.
If it’s floating, it has too much fat in it, so it’s not the product of anyone with an especially healthy poop.
Fecal transplants have actually surprising potential.
But yeah there’s a lot of dangerous pathogens as well.
A little dab’ll do ya.
