been feeling like this a lot of times.
I think you might be getting out of the honeymoon phase of your discovery of Marxism-Leninism.
Too real, going from thinking the revolution is gonna be any day now to oh, plenty of work to be done.
Exactly, once you realize the scope of the problems and that no meaningful change is going to happen in the foreseeable future, it can become daunting.
It’s a movement.
You can’t “press the revolution button.”
It takes decades, a century, even.
I am the opposite. I’m becoming more and more dedicated. i’m fighting FUD online, reading a ton of theory, consuming lots of Leftist content, joined an org, went to a meeting finally. I’m all in. No doubts in my mind at all.
It can be frustrating since it seems like an impossible battle, but I know I’m right. Empirically socialism is a better system. Capitalism has failed in all non-imperial-core countries, and barely functions in the imperial core ones.
If your material conditions aren’t basically forcing you to always try and find a way out (when you’ve already gained the beginnings of communist consciousness), you might just be struggling with the fact that your own life isn’t really that bad, and slipping into old habits.
Keep reading Marxist theory and developing your class consciousness and killing the little bourgeois-self in your head trying to commandeer your brain.
I feel more communist by the day, even though i am objectively less ultra than i was years ago. I guess ultras would consider me revisionist.
who would you consider to be ultra?
For me it’s someone that calls themself a communist but has not internalized dialectical materialism. Someone that cannot see things as a process and historical context, thus cannot see AES states as socialists.