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9 days agoI find giving gifts hard as well, and I hate that I’ often expected to be happy, even if I have no need or use for the thing So I talked with family and friends, I don’t want gifts, I don’t need gifts. I’m happy to meet, have a nice dinner. This made christmas soo much better for me. With my partner we write a list of stuff we’d like, and we get the other one/two things from that list to keep the surprise part. A surprising number of friends like giving gifts, but don’t expect it to be returned if you don’t want to.
I feel like your problems go a lot deeper, but a preemptive talk about it csn help if they are reasonable people
I work as a psychologist, fears of abbandonment are a lot more common than many think. If you are this afraid I’d recommend going to psychotherapy to sort it out. It can help a lot if you put the effort in.