I hope he’s able to make the trip and the experience inspires him to follow in his idol’s goose-steps. Just that last bit though, make it a speedrun.

At least he performed one single heroic act in those final moments: he killed Adolf Hitler.

India and places like that could have benefitted from a one child policy.

Those “benefits” come at the cost of a whole lot of dead baby girls though. Does that sound like a good trade to you?

I’m more interested in the backstory of Bigfoot learning to change tires. Is this a regular occurrence? If so, do they usually wait for people to look away and zip through like a NASCAR pit crew or is there some communication involved? “Hey man, don’t freak out but I’m a Bigfoot. Looks like car trouble, can I help?” or something along those lines. The former would explain the usual blurry appearance in photos but I like the idea that buddy Bigfoot is roaming the woods doing some casual roadside assistance and asking motorists to please be discreet once they’re back on their way.

Either way, I’d probably keep quiet. Can’t outrun or out-fight them in the first case if they didn’t appreciate my disclosure. If it was the latter option, it’d be a real dick move to spill the beans after accepting a favor like that.

Hey, glad we could find you here. Did you know that the Reddit Directed Share Program deadline is 5 March 2024?

Just what I needed to finish decorating this murder scene before the police arrive, thanks.

…greatly reduce, even revert, aging.

There’s a case to be made that it does stop its consumer from aging much further if applied correctly.

Solid punchline. I may not have laughed but it did leave me Groening.

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Unless you work at an Iranian uranium enrichment facility, then it’s fine.