deleted by creator
deleted by creator
far as I know, you can’t. they want your sweet sweet monetizable personal data. for Meta, every human interaction needs to be commodified, sold for ad revenue, and charged back to you as a subscription or AI pump and dump scheme.
I use Craigslist personally, the founder has repeatedly refused to sell his business or users data.
from the article:
By design, the company doesn’t make a single cent on most transactions. … If you’ve ever used Craigslist, you’ve probably noticed it hasn’t changed much since the 1990s. No sleek designs or flashy updates – just a simple, functional interface. “People want it simple, fast and effective,” Craig said.
Over the years, venture capitalists have approached Craig with massive offers, urging him to monetize more aggressively or sell. They saw a gold mine in Craigslist’s scale and suggested ads, subscriptions or transaction fees. But Craig wasn’t interested.
“I don’t need billions,” he said. “I’ve met a bunch of rich people and none of them are all that happy.”
actual bonding comes later, first you have to spend a bunch of time just being in the presence of other people. make acquaintances using a common activity first is a good approach.
that you say “willing to” already kinda sounds like you don’t give others much opportunity to get to know you and vice versa. as another commenter said - you may be stuck in a self limiting loop.
make opportunities for connection first - find a litter clean up volunteer event, or a community garden where they need help, or an after school club, or a friendly working class bar (this was my place of choice for years until I found better alternatives)… the specific place or context doesn’t matter. find an activity or thing you enjoy (or could see yourself enjoying) and where other people can see/be around you… and eventually, completely unplanned you will invariably get to know people and then, maybe… bond with them. bonding isn’t a prerequisite to talking and sharing information about yourself or your struggles though. it can be as simple as pulling up a bar stool and raising a glass to someone you just met. or the non alcoholic equivalent if you don’t drink, I guess.
I don’t believe for a second that some sleuthing podcasters have created some impeachable, wholly accurate representation of a whole ass person based solely on their goodreads posts or random trail of breadcrumbs left in Facebook selfies… give me a break with the parasocial psychoanalysis. no one fucking knows shit about anyone if all you have to go on is their posts or what their college classmate said.
more importantly, who fucking cares? folks need to stop pretending they were best friends with Anthony Bourdain or they SO RELATE to Taylor Swift. you don’t know someone because you listened to a podcast or followed their insta. same applies to Luigi.
Actions >> (online bullshit, speculation, hype)
every accusation is a confession
(not always, but especially with conservatives fascists)
it’s a shitty time to be alive for many of us. some have it much worse than others, and there’s truly no rational explanation why things are this way. I’m sorry for your pain and what you’re going through. you don’t deserve it. no one does. glib life advice from strangers on the internet should not be given lightly or taken too seriously… but, since you asked directly, here goes.
find someone who will listen and commiserate, preferably irl. who and where will vary wildly dependending on your circumstances but consider that many people nowadays are longing for someone to connect with (not romantically, just someone who can listen without judgement). if you learn to reciprocate that vibe, you’ll find someone in no time.
exercise, move your body around for at least 30 minutes continuously, every damn day. doesn’t matter what, just MOVE. walk around your neighborhood, back and forth to the store, or even around the campus/work parking lot at lunch. bonus points if you can convince someone else to walk with you.
disable all notifications on your phone, except critical contacts like close family or friends, (or work if you have serious responsibilities - gotta pay those bills).you need to reclaim your time as your own. agency is a big part of self dignity, and having a machine dictate your time is dehumanizing.
hang out around other people in a public space, preferably where nature can be enjoyed or where laughter can be heard. just watch and listen to the world. a park bench, a library, a dive bar (not a sports bar with TVs or tourists, but regulars). participating in the rhythm of social and natural spaces can be a kind of mindfulness and gets the juices flowing so to speak.
more ideas come to mind but this might be a start. good luck stranger. ps, check out “tragic optimism”. has helped me a lot over the years. take care.
🧑🍳🤌