Some arguments can be productive because they can help you get to the heart of a matter, to understand what each person feels about it, and to come to a solution.

Some arguments, however, are not just unproductive; they are damaging to the relationship and the issue at hand. It is easier than you think to know the difference, dear Gemini.

If you are on the verge of an argument with someone now, you must assess the issue at hand and who you are dealing with.

Are they listening, participating, and making useful suggestions aimed at a great solution? If not, you need to find another way to get to an answer.