Hilarious Chaos
  • Communities
  • Create Post
  • Create Community
  • heart
    Support Lemmy
  • search
    Search
  • Login
  • Sign Up
Centurion@lemmy.world to Funny: Home of the Haha@lemmy.world · 11 months ago

One way ticket

lemmy.world

message-square
16
link
fedilink
369

One way ticket

lemmy.world

Centurion@lemmy.world to Funny: Home of the Haha@lemmy.world · 11 months ago
message-square
16
link
fedilink
alert-triangle
You must log in or # to comment.
  • Maven (famous)@lemmy.zip
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    32
    ·
    11 months ago

    Okay sure… Your daughter was kidnapped or whatever… But who the fuck names their daughter “Virginity”

    • brygphilomena@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      21
      ·
      11 months ago

      Chastity?

      • Maven (famous)@lemmy.zip
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        11 months ago

        You make a good point…

      • SendMePhotos@lemmy.world
        cake
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        11 months ago

        Abstinence

        • SkybreakerEngineer@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          5
          ·
          11 months ago

          Visit The Unbelievers With Explanatory Pamphlets

      • ripcord@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        11 months ago

        “Prudence”, too.

      • ripcord@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        11 months ago

        “Premarital Chastity Jones”

    • Anticorp@lemmy.worldM
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      11 months ago

      I don’t have any money. What I do have is a very unique set of skills.

      • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        11 months ago

        If you come round my place, you might see me cleaning my guns. This might make you scared. Unless you’re carrying yours and it isn’t completely disassembled for cleaning, which would put me at a significant disadvantage. Unless your gun is too dirty to function properly, then the advantage will be back to me.

        At that point, I would suggest just carefully pulling my daughter’s virginity out of your pocket, setting it on the floor, and telling my daughter she should get back to doing the dishes because the date is cancelled. Also that she should respect me again. And then leave.

  • peopleproblems@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    17
    ·
    11 months ago

    Can he even remain mad at that point? He’s technically correct, the best kind of correct.

    • LavenderDay3544@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      11 months ago

      Unless he has another daughter…

      • ripcord@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        11 months ago

        Is she a beautiful, robot daughter?

  • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    12
    ·
    11 months ago

    Other than the funny…stay the hell out of your daughter’s sex life, creep.

  • bleistift2@sopuli.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    11 months ago

    “Nah, she gave it to me”

    Alternatively: “Yes, but now she has mine.”

  • Rolando@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    11 months ago

    “Didn’t happen with your wife, though!”

  • NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    11 months ago

    You give it back NOW!!

Funny: Home of the Haha@lemmy.world

funny@lemmy.world

Subscribe from Remote Instance

Create a post
You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !funny@lemmy.world

Welcome to /c/funny, a place for all your humorous and amusing content.

Looking for mods! Send an application to Stamets!

Our Rules:

  1. Keep it civil. We’re all people here. Be respectful to one another.

  2. No sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or any other flavor of bigotry. I should not need to explain this one.

  3. Try not to repost anything posted within the past month. Beyond that, go for it. Not everyone is on every site all the time.


Other Communities:

  • /c/TenForward@lemmy.world - Star Trek chat, memes and shitposts

  • /c/Memes@lemmy.world - General memes

Visibility: Public
globe

This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

  • 20 users / day
  • 2.7K users / week
  • 4.69K users / month
  • 8.42K users / 6 months
  • 2 local subscribers
  • 7.59K subscribers
  • 882 Posts
  • 5.9K Comments
  • Modlog
  • mods:
  • Anticorp@lemmy.world
  • aeronmelon@lemmy.world
  • BE: 0.19.12
  • Modlog
  • Legal
  • Instances
  • Docs
  • Code
  • join-lemmy.org