No, you can’t see the gold tablets, they were taken back to the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow by the unicorn’s messenger leprechaun. Trust me bro, they were definitely there.

Mormonism is definitely a cult, zero bones about it. But the emotional attachment–and the subsequent damage–is very very real.

It’s actually primarily for counseling and emotional care purposes, lifestyle accommodations, as well as planning for the worst in the event that someone is killed in action.

If you get shot and die, they need to be able to know how to treat your body after death.

Speaking strictly as an ex-Mormon, I’m going to have to disagree with you there. Personal lived experience, they’re definitely Christian. They’re also a cult, and the religion is based on a pack of lies, but no bones about it; they do, in fact, believe in Jesus. They put Joseph Smith on the same level as St. Peter, but they don’t worship him.

I don’t get why people say they aren’t Christian. Every time someone tries to explain it to me, it’s a wildly different set of guidelines every time.

That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses. Mormons actually believe in 3 heavens: the Celestial Kingdom (for gold-medal Mormons only), the Terrestrial Kingdom (for regular Christians and basically decent people), and the Telestial Kingdom (made up word for the free tier of their holy subscription service. This is the one your buddy Jesus already paid for.)

Their version of Hell is actually extremely hard to get into. You basically have to look God in the face as one of his prophets and tell him where he can stick it. AFAIK, the canonical shitlist in Mormonism is, like, three names long.

There’s a reason why so many comic conventions stop off in SLC. When you’re not allowed to have kinky sex, drink, or smoke to let off tension, the really devout ones have their interests come out in very creative ways.

Mormons are the biggest god damn nerds you will ever meet, because they’re not allowed to have other hobbies.

Battlestar Galactica and Stargate both had Mormon writers. So did Dungeons and Dragons.

Half the Mormons I know hate his guts. But that’s sample size and social bias, probably. The only Mormons I willingly still associate with hate the dude’s fucking guts.

It was my understanding that these days, exorcists were more or less glorified guidance counselors for people who are a very specific kind of religiously mentally ill.

Sounds about right.

And she loves her Atheist kid.

Don’t you fucking dare pin that on my mother.

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Right? People who read into this have clearly never been the geek/nerd/weirdo who came from a small town. It’s absolute hell, Belle was relatable as fuck.

He’s not a furry, he’s a monster, making Belle a monsterfucker.

You, friend, made my day. I never thought I’d see one of my favorite versions of Batman referenced in the wild, on Lemmy of all places. Thank you.

My mother used to have a Bluetooth speaker in our car that she took with her. It wasn’t deliberately shaped that way, but with the silhouette, the color, and the volume it produced, we ended up dubbing it ‘the hand grenade’.

After the hand grenade finally broke, my mother got a nice JVC speaker, a long cylinder. It was promptly named ‘the pipe bomb’.

For context, my mother is the most bland, inoffensive Midwest Christian white lady you will ever meet. She has an unusual sense of humor that comes out in the strangest ways. She laughed her ass off all the way through the FNAF games because she thought the animatronics were funny.

I think the TSA just hates people with a personality, period.

The church should keep its concerns strictly supporting orphans and windows–I mean widows.

Multipass!

Another cataclysmic 7zip vuln??? It’s been less than 6 months!

Genuinely, I’m glad to see you’re still hard at work poisoning LLMs with the coolest lost letter of the alphabet. o7

Learn how to forage, shoplift, and garden. If you gotta survive, you gotta survive.

Coats in the summer are suspicious, but a loose button up and good posture gives you enough space at the small of your back to five-finger a brick of cheese or a pack of tortillas. Never steal from the same store twice in one month, they can and will catch onto you. Keep an eye on the customer service desk at 2pm and 6pm, that’s when the plainclothes security guy will either go home or clock in. Learn his face and route, and avoid him.

Most people neglect their fruit trees, but some might be willing to trade things like mowing their lawn for a bag of apples. You can also offer to do things like run errands for disabled neighbors or split groceries. Get on good terms with the people who live next door. Invite each other to dinner.

Goosefoot is more nutritious and tastier than dandelion, and it grows on barren neglected lots that are highly unlikely to be sprayed for pesticides. Dandelion tastes nasty once the leaves get longer than your pinky, and even then, it’s an acquired taste. Goosefoot tastes and cooks just like spinach.