I’d love to know what would happen if Jesus were way darker and older than expected.

Welp, I guess I’m all out of money for new tech. Time to travel or find a new hobby.

Ngl, I grew up thinking I was gay, but…

Whoa, this commenter just

Me when my wallet doesn’t pass the vibe check

/thread

^/s

And the 5Gs

You hush your gush

I’d rather face the extremely interesting and important Trumpstein Files.

Wouldn’t surprise me if she could peel her skin off her face

Are you joking? I can never tell anymore

Is the Sharia Law in the state with you right now?

Umm, team not-red is the correct side.

Trash bagels WITH AVOCADO. Would you believe?? Goddamn millennials…

Short answer: yes

Long answer: yeeeeeeeessssss*

* With some exceptions for medicinal marihuana

The freedom to oppress everyone? The freedom to not be prosecuted by ICE because of their skin tone? I’m trying hard to figure this one out.

Our AI that monitors customer interactions sometimes makes up shit that didn’t happen during the call. Any agent smart enough could probably fool it into giving the wrong summary with the right key words. I only caught on when I started reading the logs carefully, but I don’t know if management cares so long as the business client is happy.

Because nobody dares

So a gay man would have to, on average, give a blowjob 9 times more frequently than a woman to break even.

Pfft. Bro, I’ve blown 6 men in 1 day. I’m a dude. I doubt women would be up for a blowjob a week, but I know plenty of gay men who would do it every day of the week if they could.

She could absolutely win. The problem is the Dems putting forth unpopular women.