Mate I’ve had some cracker first dates that didn’t work out in the long run but were absolutely part of the tapestry which got me to here.
The number of good first dates far outweighs the weird and shitty ones.
Some of my most treasured experiences are those quiet intimate moments just between two of you. An experience that just the two of you share. It is profound.
We are our experiences.
Asked a girl out on a date. She invited me over to watch a movie with her at her parents house (we were in our late teens). I arrived; her recently deceased family dog and incredibly distressed mother were both in the kitchen. Dog was a really big golden retriever that had been euthanized, and the mom had bought him home? Not sure why? Maybe to bury in the back yard or something? Idk
Anyway I offered to leave but she was insistent that we watch the movie together, which we did, on the couch, with her mom crying in the next room. Halfway through the movie the mom screams he’s still alive, he’s still alive. Go into the kitchen, she’d gone to move the body and it had expelled air and made some noise. I had to explain, with my best year 12 biology, what had happened. Five minutes of this woman losing her shit with grief out of her beloved companion dying.
Girl insisted we watch the last 10 minutes of the movie, it finishes with us watching in silence, I get up to leave and said something stupid like hey I’d love to do this again sometime and she says “I have a boyfriend”
I’m like alright well that’s that then and didn’t put in any more effort. Stupid me, she was hot and I really liked her. Being a dipshit I wrote a song about it, using the three guitar chords I knew, which takes me to act ii…
…five years later, I’m at a party, exchanging worst first date stories with friends and fellow partygoers including a cute blonde. I wait my turn, tell the story, she laughs her arse off and then goads me into singing the song, accompanying myself poorly on the guitar. I absolutely fucking nail it, everyone is in stitches, sit down next to her and the night goes from there. We end up leaving the party for a walk down to the local beach, made out on the beach, things get frisky, jump in a cab back to my house, in bed together, have drunken sex…which results in a broken condom. She lives literally the other side of town so we have to wait till (a) I’m sober enough to drive and (b) pharmacy is open to get a plan b, then have the most awkward drive back to her house. Get there, offer to walk her to the door, she says no, kisses me goodbye in the car, then texts me…to say she has a boyfriend.
Tricky, theirs is a cover version, so the original would still exist.
tbh we are all just snapshots of ourselves at different stage of the same cycle. The Simpsons did a whole thing about lolapalooza which starts with homer looking for his favourite artists in a record store, and the record store dude, and being directed to the oldies section.
The bands that feature in that episode are the smashing pumpkins, soundgarden , cypress Hill and Peter Frampton, all of whom appear in Spotify old school lists
Wooosh
*"Listen, happy endings is fine if they turn out happy,” said Granny, glaring at the sky. “But you can’t make ‘em for other people. Like the only way you could make a happy marriage is by cuttin’ their heads off as soon as they say ‘I do’, yes? You can’t make happiness…” Granny Weatherwax stared at the distant city.
Huh. Never knew that was his full name.
Anything that you can think of has already been thought of, modelled, and done by international actors who have more resources, technical capability and time than you, and have far fewer morals.
You want a specific outcome to this election? So do Russia and China. They’re a lot better at this than you are and are orders of magnitude more invested in it.
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Could be
Intentional self aware and self effacing humour from the couple
A tongue in cheek thing arranged by either the bride or groom
She did all the work in arranging it and he doesn’t give a shit about marriage so a passive aggressive way of her celebrating an event that matters for he, but not for him
Soneone photoshopping
I live in Australia
The homicide rate here is 0.86 deaths per 100k people per year
Of those, approx 66% are male.
The suicide rate is 12.3 deaths per 100k per year.
Of those, 75% are male.
The statistics are similar in most Western countries.
Pause for a second and think about the last time that you heard that mentioned either in casual conversation or in the news media.
It is not spoken about.
It’s missing a comma
Tldr “In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony god’s blessing. But because, I am enlightened by my intelligence”
Yeah seconded… That worked for me.
I spent a bit of time going through your post history to get an understanding of your background
In short I think your life experiences mean you’ve lost all trust in men. Not just your direct experiences but what you’ve observed in others.
As a result you enter each interaction assuming the worst. Every male social worker you engage with will confirm this pattern because that’s what you’re looking for. The - ah fuck here we go again - feeling.
For them, and I don’t expect you to have empathy for them, this is what they live - the outcomes of other mens behaviours. But - they were there and they tried. That is something.
You have changed quite a lot of your original post.
I was young and naive, even a couple years later I would’ve done a bit of digging. You know, questions like what’s his name, how long you guys been going out for, shouldn’t he be here with you in your moment of need given your fucking dog is dead.