Tanis Nikana

Academia 4XX AF from Final Fantasy XIII-2! (It’s also my favorite Final Fantasy.)

With this playing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPuw_AJ3iNc

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Hate to break your heart over this, but it ain’t gonna happen. Give up on your dreams of arbitrarily changing orthography with an inconsistent look to the past, and realize that we have “th” in place, which was already taught to English speakers, and is present on every keyboard.

I got two languages on my phone, and I’m not about to install the goddamn Icelandic keyboard so I can triple-tap past Japanese and type some sort of bullshitty shortcut to “th” which were already present on my second keyboard, English.

Not even protect, really, but also “ensure they experience not the slightest discomfort nor the smallest penalty of law, and make sure their ever-expanding demand for luxury is exceeded in every measure.”

~guillotines are good for the environment~

Oh no! It looks like you don’t have enough block! Would you like to buy enough block to survive this round with 1 HP for $0.99?

Second, UFO 50 is amazing!

I’m an author of two books, and whenever someone asks me for a copy (or even says they want to read it), I straight-up hand them a free ebook. I just want people to read me.

I started out as a quizmaster, telling quiz for a night a week. I’d open my show with a new 45-second bit each week, built audience numbers over time.

Then I realized I’d been doing this for years, and was an incredibly prolific comic! I had enough material I could just walk out onto a stage and just lengthen out my opening bits, cause I no longer had a quiz to tell that night!

“I’m a stand-up comic.”

“Ooh! Heckle me!”

“I don’t know anything about you and don’t wanna say anything mean about you. Just enjoy the moment without getting a performer to do free work for you.”

“You’re no fun.”

“Don’t have to be on all the time, let me eat my burger.”

Jason Pargin is a goddamn hero.

Asexual and sex-repulsed married lesbian here. Although I love my wife romantically very much, I don’t want to do anything to her chest.

Big Katalepsis vibes.

I don’t have any pockets on most of my outfits, but I have a holster on my left hip that holds my phone, my book reader, my wallet, my keys, and a glasses wipe.

I read a lot. But there’s also Slay the Spire on my phone.

(Also I guess I have bluetooth conductors basically permanently attached to my head so I can have music whenever I want, and a d20 ring on one finger, a wrist watch on a wrist, a pair of glasses to match an outfit, a pendant for the same, a hair tie in my hair, and a meter for a study. This is all automatic stuff though, and I just have this while I’m in my house.)

My brain instinctively rejects that image. Not cause it isn’t accurate; it’s showing what it’s supposed to.

But really, that the shape of it is hostile and threatening and it looks vaguely biological and some creepy shit gets sent up and down my spine about it.

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I’d turn into a big old land tortoise and then just be a turtle.

Benefits:

• strong shell
• feets for marching
• cute tail bump
• adorable smile
• can flip friends over when they need help
• turtle

4,000 weeks. 750k hours. That’s what the average human gets.

This is how I keep count.

Don’t dial that phone number to see if it works; you’ll get the fuzz.

I hate when people use the transitive “going to be” to describe “is.”

“Hey, what’s your phone number?” “It’s going to be 911-551-0911.”

Her phone number is 911-551-0911 and has been such for a while now. Why does she feel the need to use a transitive verb structure to describe that it will change to that in the future?

I see people using this “it’s going to be” structure for ordering food (they are ordering food now, saying “spaghetti, please” is much less weird than saying “it’s going to be spaghetti”), as part of my job when someone is reporting current or past statistics, and events that aren’t coming up or aren’t scheduled, and are in the past.