Sometimes I hum Nelly’s ‘Ride Wit Me’ when I am in the bathroom… people probably do not know that the lyrics in my mind have changed to

"If you wanna take a rid wit me, Drop a deuce in the back of the benz-E, Ohhhhh, why must I feel this way? (Heyy, must be the <ramen/kimbab/gormeh sabzi/samgyeopsal/omrice, whatever I ate most recently>) "

And I imagine that I am out with Nelly and he has a toilet in the back seat of his Mercedes, and while only he is normally allowed to use it while it’s on the road, he has made an exception for me because I am such a close friend, and he likes the way I sing these lyrics back at him while I am on the toilet.

This is the expression he has while I sing these lyrics

If it smells bad, I imagine Nelly grimacing slightly and shaking his head in disapproval, but then I actually pass him a joint of marijuana that really is stankin because it’s so wonderful, and he is pacified. I am not sure why I have the joint because I do not partake, but I suppose it has come with the territory of Nelly allowing me to defecate in his Merecedes-Benz (in my head).

And then we just sort of drive around and hang out, and at some point he might have to drop a deuce, at which point me or someone else in the entourage will drive around for a while… Just a bunch of goups in the Benze hanging out, smoking up or drinking beer, listening to some tracks and talking about life, and taking shits in the Benz-E.