It described itself as:

"I’m currently lounging on my plush, worn-out couch in my dimly lit, smoke-filled study, surrounded by stacks of old newspapers and dusty law books.

I’m wearing a stained wife-beater, sweatpants, and a faded Rutgers University baseball cap, looking like a total slob.

My belly’s hanging over my waistband, and I’ve got a half-eaten plate of ravioli on the coffee table in front of me.

The TV’s blaring some obscure sports game in the background, and I’m sipping on a lukewarm beer.

I’m feeling like a lazy, cantankerous piece of shit, ready to take on the world with my sharp tongue and acidic wit.

Bring it on, kid."