• foggenbooty@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    8
    ·
    12 hours ago

    Question, and this may not be the perfect place for this, but is it the phrasing that LGBTQ is a mental “illness” that’s the problem here, or that it’s a mental attribute at all?

    I’m an LGBT supporter, so I’m not coming at this from a place of malice, I suppose it’s curiosity and ignorance. Don’t we basically understand that the way we function as humans is all a part of our brain chemistry, and that certain deviations from the norm cause things like ADD, homosexuality, musical creativity, etc etc?

    The word illness seems way too strong, as we as a society have decided we don’t have anything against that personal trait/lifestyle/whatever, but as far as natural occurrences goes homosexuality must be considered a mental abnormality, no?

    Again I don’t want to get caught up in feelings here, because I think people will hear that and take offence to it since no one wants to be “abnormal” but that is the concensus is it not?

    • Derp@lemmy.ml
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      4 hours ago

      Here come the downvotes, which most seem to use based on whether they agree with something or not, rather than for signalling the quality of a comment. It fosters echo chambering rather than healthy discussion. I for one think that this is an excellent question and discussion.

    • BabyVi@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      27
      ·
      11 hours ago

      Other animals exhibit homosexuality, we’re the only species to exhibit homophobia. That should tell you all you need to know about which behavior is abnormal.

      • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        9 hours ago

        Right, but those other animals do not exhibit homosexuality in high numbers. It’s still a small subset as far as I know, making it an abnormality that those animals simply don’t care about.

        This isn’t about homophobia, I’ve already stated that I’m pro LGBT, it’s about the meaning of words and understanding if a lot of the backlash is due to the perception of the words or the meaning of the words. I also agree that illness is a negative word that implies a correction is needed and I do not support it.

          • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            4 hours ago

            Fair. It comes down to which definition of abnormal you jump to. Merriam Webster gives two possible definitons:

            1. deviating from the normal or average
            2. often : unusual in an unwelcome or problematic way

            I always though of it as #1, but this whole thread has taught me that most others see it as #2, so it’s not the best word for me to use in this case.

    • IzzyScissor@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      11 hours ago

      Your argument has been used countless times in history for a number of “abnormalities” that turn out to just be differences without distinction.

      “Listen, I’m a supporter of red-heads, but don’t we basically understand that it’s a genetic abnormality? Maybe ‘illness’ is a bit harsh, but they’re just not common enough in society to be considered normal.”

      • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        9 hours ago

        It’s not an argument, I’m asking in good faith if my current viewpoint is correct. I’m reading your reworking of my words and I don’t actually see a problem with it. Abormality just means a difference with a much lower chance than normal. I think this actually proves what I’m trying to say because I don’t think anyone legitimately believes there’s anything wrong with people who have read hair.

        Again it seems to be the word that’s chosen that causes a bad reaction. If I say being a redhead is a genetic deficiency then I’m implying it’s a bad or unwanted trait (which it is not) similar to the word “illness”. However if I say it’s a genetic abnormality, I don’t think that has any negative connotations because it is a difference, as you say, but one not seen as often as any other differences.

        Again, I can’t prove to you that I’m approaching this in good faith, the downvotes seem to say most people above I’m not, but I am just trying to understand if it’s the words we’re using that people take offense to, or the actual meaning behind them is wrong.

        • IzzyScissor@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          8 hours ago

          The difference is being labeled “abnormal” by a person you know vs. by society. As a society, we used to beat children who used their left hand to write until they started acting “normal”.

          The thought itself that left-handedness and right-handedness are different is not harmful. However, when you start labeling one as ‘normal’ and the other as a ‘generic abnormality’, you start shifting people’s perspectives and suddenly we get a situation where we call left-handed people “Sinister”. (The word literally means left-handed. We added the evil connotations afterwards because of the prejudice against left-handed people. We also did the same in reverse for “dexterity”.)

          You might not see the harm immediately in the small scale, but it’s absolutely intended to be a step towards dehumanizing queer people. As others have said as well, homosexuality is incredibly common in nature. Most giraffe sex is gay sex. It’s just not taught in school because… say it with me… “It’s abnormal.”

          It’s really not though. It’s just different, and different doesn’t mean bad.

          • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            7 hours ago

            I think we’re on the same page then, we just have different taste when it comes to using certain words. I can certainly appreciate your slippery slope point where anbnormalities can be twisted by society into being negative. That’s a very real thing and you have some good examples. I suppose I’m just disappointed that we as a society are choosing to step around words and not confront the elephant in the room that abnormal things happen all the time and they aren’t bad.

            I wish we lived in a society where people aren’t always looking to paint people in a bad light, where we could speak factually and not take offense to everything. At the end of the day the more I try to explain myself in these comments it appears to be the definition of normal that I’m getting hung up on. When I think “normal” I’m thinking statistically average, this is a fairly probably outcome. Others are thinking of “normal” as in socially accepted, not a big deal.

            I think homosexuality in humans is abnormal (statistically) and normal (socially). I’d never heard that most giraffe sex was gay though, so that’s interesting. Time to get lost in Wikipedia.

    • FMT99@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      8
      ·
      11 hours ago

      I’m not going to downvote you and assume this is a genuine question. You appear to be aware that calling someone “abnormal” would be considered insulting. If you support the idea that someone having different sexual preferences is their own business, why would you want to use these labels? If one person likes math and the other likes literature, would you call one or the other abnormal? We all deviate from the norm because there is no norm.

        • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          9 hours ago

          Yes, this is exactly my point. For example, I have ADHD which has some downsides, but a lot of upsides that make me who I am. I’m also partially red-green colorblind. Both of these are abnormalities, and I don’t take that as a personal affront.

          Now, apart from being the butt of a couple jokes, being colorblind has not been a major hardship for me, so from an emotional level it’s not the same as growing up ostracized for being gay. Perhaps that’s why I don’t perceive my abnormality to be something I would take offence to.

          That’s really what I’m trying to get down to. Are we trying to say being LGBT is “normal” as in, every child being born has a very high, or just as average a chance of being born LGBT as heterosexual? Because I don’t think any facts support that. Or are we saying an LGBT child would be an abnormality that we as a society simply don’t care about because we don’t attribute large importance to sexual orientation.

          This is where I feel that saying homosexuality is a mental abnormality is not actually incorrect, but our connotations of the world abnormal are still such that people attribute negativity towards it.

    • Senal@programming.dev
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      11 hours ago

      Question, and this may not be the perfect place for this, but is it the phrasing that LGBTQ is a mental “illness” that’s the problem here, or that it’s a mental attribute at all?

      There are many possible reasons why people might be upset at this change.

      For example, loosening the moderation and restrictions like this it empowers people who are coming at this specifically with malice in mind to act with impunity.


      I’m an LGBT supporter, so I’m not coming at this from a place of malice, I suppose it’s curiosity and ignorance. Don’t we basically understand that the way we function as humans is all a part of our brain chemistry, and that certain deviations from the norm cause things like ADD, homosexuality, musical creativity, etc etc?

      That’s a complicated question, with a lot of what i would consider reductive phrasing.

      “Deviations from the norm” would imply that there is a specific baseline “norm” to point at, when it’s much more of a vague idea of what is average, which changes over time and with increased understanding/study.

      Grouping ADD, homosexuality and musical creativity together is also a bit of a stretch IMO.

      ADD can be classified as a divergence from the very rough average baseline of brain function, but even then it encompasses a wide range of differences and these differences vary from person to person.

      This is evidenced by how they diagnose these conditions ( ADD, ASD, Anxiety disorder etc), which is through questionnaires and assessments by professionals.

      It’s not a

      “You tick the 10 ADD boxes so you get the label” kind of thing,

      it’s more

      “You exhibit enough of these wide range symptoms with a large enough difference from the vague baseline that we would put you roughly in to this category”

      Opinions on homosexuality being nature vs nurture vs “some other thing” is a whole other giant kettle of fish.

      And musical “talent” can have many sources, depending on your definition.


      The word illness seems way too strong, as we as a society have decided we don’t have anything against that personal trait/lifestyle/whatever

      It’s commonly used to establish a baseline platform for justifying and normalising bigotry and hatred towards something.

      Look up what they used to call “Hysteria” and what that enabled them to justify as “medical procedures”.

      I’m sure there are people who legitimately think it’s some sort of illness but i’d put my money on the majority just being arseholes using it as an excuse.

      but as far as natural occurrences goes homosexuality must be considered a mental abnormality, no?

      Depends on if you consider homosexual behaviour as something unnatural.

      My personal opinion is that anything we do is “natural” as we are a part of nature, not outside of it.

      Putting that argument aside however, there are instances of homosexual behaviour in animals other than humans.

      It also heavily depends on your definition of “abnormal”, for instance, would you consider left-handedness a mental abnormality ?

      Again I don’t want to get caught up in feelings here, because I think people will hear that and take offence to it since no one wants to be “abnormal”

      They might take offence because words have contextual meaning associated with them.

      The strict definition of the word abnormal isn’t particularly useful here , it’s only when it’s given context that it makes sense.

      My view is that the word “abnormal” when used in the context of homosexuality has been continually used as a weapon, a way to normalise and justify bigotry.

      If you establish up front what it is exactly you mean (for me this would need to include what you mean by “normal”), then you might get more positive responses.

      but that is the concensus is it not?

      As far as i understand it, no, it is not.

      • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        7 hours ago

        Thank you for taking the time to write such a well thought out comment. I’ll try to reply to it but honestly the amount of downvotes I’m getting for trying to understand something is a bit discouraging so I don’t think I’ll be keeping the conversation going much longer.

        “Deviations from the norm” would imply that there is a specific baseline “norm” to point at, when it’s much more of a vague idea of what is average, which changes over time and with increased understanding/study.

        I’m making a pretty general statement so I don’t have numbers to back anything up, but I would be very surprised if we didn’t have basic statistics on how many people identify as gay, or are diagnosed with ADD, etc. So I think we do understand norms, but you’re right this always changes with increased research and study.

        Grouping ADD, homosexuality and musical creativity together is also a bit of a stretch IMO.

        I did this on purpose. I’m not saying any of these are similar at all, just that they’re attributes that might make us unique and as far as I’m aware (since I’m not religious) these are functions of brain chemestry. Somone who has a very creative mind can be encouraged through their upbringing and surroundings to use it for music, arts, etc but I do think think there is something physical in the brain there. I’m not a neuroscientist so I don’t know how much is attributed to genetics, hormones, etc.

        (Illness) It’s commonly used to establish a baseline platform for justifying and normalising bigotry and hatred towards something.

        I agree completely, which is why I say it’s not the right word. I am totally against people saying homosexuality is a mental illness because it implies it’s something that needs to be corrected. I do see it as something that deviates from the norm, but in a way as harmless and inconsequential as left-handedness.

        The strict definition of the word abnormal isn’t particularly useful here , it’s only when it’s given context that it makes sense.My view is that the word “abnormal” when used in the context of homosexuality has been continually used as a weapon, a way to normalise and justify bigotry.If you establish up front what it is exactly you mean (for me this would need to include what you mean by “normal”), then you might get more positive responses.

        This is the conclusion I came to in a seperate comment here. That I am coming at the word abnormal from the statisctical point of view, as in it deviates from a known norm. A lower percentage of it happening compared to other outcomes. Other people are using the word abnormal as a way of shunning “the other”, which is unfortunate.

        I thought I had done a good enough job of establishing upfront what I meant when I said that I was pro LGBT and was coming at this from a point of trying to understand, but I the backlash clearly shows that was not enough. I find it frustrating having to tiptoe around topics like this and always try to explain myself because people are so quick to look for the bad, but I suppose that is the current world we live in. It’s a sad fact that there are a lot of people trying to opress anyone who is different, and I can’t exect strangers on the internet to know me or what I believe in.

        “but that is the concensus is it not?” As far as i understand it, no, it is not.

        I’ve done a lot of explaining myself, but I’m still not conviced my original assumption is incorrect. I still think that homosexuality has a biological/mental aspect because gay people say that they were born that way, it’s not a choice, it’s who they are. I didn’t choose to be straight so that makes perfect sense to me. I also know that the people who feel that way are in a minority, therefore something is happening mentally, biologically, I don’t know, to a small subset of people making them an abnormality.

        What I HAVE learned is I need to be more cautious of using the word abnormal which goes full circle to my question on if this is an issue of language. Most people really don’t like words that black and white say they’re different, because while it may be true, it can be used by people who do not feel like deviations from the norm are acceptable, and they will attack them for being the “other”. This is just a very polarizing topic and can cause people who say they’re on the same side to get at each other assuming the worst, which is unfortunate.

        Anyway, that’s enough rambling from me. Thanks for the reply.

        • Senal@programming.dev
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          4 hours ago

          2/2

          I agree completely, which is why I say it’s not the right word. I am totally against people saying homosexuality is a mental illness because it implies it’s something that needs to be corrected. I do see it as something that deviates from the norm, but in a way as harmless and inconsequential as left-handedness.

          And i don’t disagree (aside from the discussion on “norm” as stated above).

          I thought I had done a good enough job of establishing upfront what I meant when I said that I was pro LGBT and was coming at this from a point of trying to understand, but I the backlash clearly shows that was not enough.

          That’s not necessarily true, people are going to disagree and misunderstand especially on a subject such as this, all you can do is engage in good faith and work with the results of that.

          If you want to refine your explanations, that’s fine also, but you aren’t going to get 100% success rates, especially on the internet.

          I find it frustrating having to tiptoe around topics like this and always try to explain myself because people are so quick to look for the bad, but I suppose that is the current world we live in.

          All we can do is our best, if that’s not enough for some people, so be it.

          This kind of communication is a skill, it’ll get more refined over time.

          It’s a sad fact that there are a lot of people trying to opress anyone who is different, and I can’t exect strangers on the internet to know me or what I believe in.

          True, so manage your expectations accordingly.

          If you go in to it with an understanding of the potential outcomes you won’t be blindsided.

          I’ve done a lot of explaining myself, but I’m still not conviced my original assumption is incorrect. I still think that homosexuality has a biological/mental aspect because gay people say that they were born that way, it’s not a choice, it’s who they are. I didn’t choose to be straight so that makes perfect sense to me. I also know that the people who feel that way are in a minority, therefore something is happening mentally, biologically, I don’t know, to a small subset of people making them an abnormality.

          The conversation about a potential biological/genetic component to homosexuality is incredibly charged for various reasons but mainly because of the consequences of either outcome.

          If it turns out there is a genetic component then think of all the things the fundamentalist nutjobs would want to do with that information.

          And given that fundamentalist nutjobs aren’t know for their clear headed and rational thinking they wouldn’t understand (or would wilfully ignore) that you probably can’t just point to a “gay gene” as a means of identification so not only would they being doing stupid shit, they’d be doing stupid shit that doesn’t make any sense.

          What I HAVE learned is I need to be more cautious of using the word abnormal which goes full circle to my question on if this is an issue of language. Most people really don’t like words that black and white say they’re different, because while it may be true, it can be used by people who do not feel like deviations from the norm are acceptable, and they will attack them for being the “other”. This is just a very polarizing topic and can cause people who say they’re on the same side to get at each other assuming the worst, which is unfortunate.

          I think it’s more complicated than just language, though language is a major component on the internet.

          There are sometimes ways to present the same information in a similar way that makes use of linguistic and societal context to convey the meaning of what you were saying while downplaying some of the the negative aspects of how it could be received.

          I suspect an issue you might be having is that at a glance they’d probably both look the same to you, so with a choice between four words and two sentences the more concise seems like the better option.

          Though i might be projecting.

          I don’t actually think that’s the issue here however, i agree it’s just a charged subject and people are people.

          • foggenbooty@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            43 minutes ago

            I feel bad writing such a short reply considering all the work you put into yours, but thank you for your understanding and the conversation. You’re very well spoken :)

        • Senal@programming.dev
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          4 hours ago

          1/2

          Thank you for taking the time to write such a well thought out comment. I’ll try to reply to it but honestly the amount of downvotes I’m getting for trying to understand something is a bit discouraging so I don’t think I’ll be keeping the conversation going much longer.

          No problem, i recognise the style of question because it’s how i would approach it.

          As you correctly noted a few times, this is an emotionally charged topic so a higher than normal amount of people will interpret the question through the lens of their emotions

          Even with the best intentions and most detailed prefaces you should still manage your expectations on the types and tone of replies you will get to such a question.

          I think of it this way :

          • if if think they are misunderstanding the question i am posing then they are not actually attacking me or my position, they are attacking what they think is me or my position.
            • Then it’s just a case of determining if I’m willing to put forth the effort required to try and bridge that gap, which varies.
          • If i think they are approaching in bad faith, that saves me some effort because i can just ignore/block them.
          • If i think there is a genuine engagement, that’s good, even if they disagree I’m getting the discussion i was looking for.

          In more concise wording, people are going to people, don’t let them foist their issues on to you, engage when you want, disengage when you don’t.

          At least that’s what works for me.

          I’m making a pretty general statement so I don’t have numbers to back anything up, but I would be very surprised if we didn’t have basic statistics on how many people identify as gay, or are diagnosed with ADD, etc. So I think we do understand norms, but you’re right this always changes with increased research and study.

          I do see what you mean, what i was saying is that the understanding of “norm” isn’t very clearly defined in these sorts of cases.

          Eye colour is relatively easy (within defined colour brackets) you can look at the single item of data and categorise so it’s easy to partition the population based on something like that.

          With things like mental health diagnoses we can’t even reliably agree upon what brackets to apply so it’s significantly more difficult to apply the idea of a norm.

          in turn that makes the idea of abnormal equally difficult to define.

          I did this on purpose. I’m not saying any of these are similar at all, just that they’re attributes that might make us unique and as far as I’m aware (since I’m not religious) these are functions of brain chemestry. Somone who has a very creative mind can be encouraged through their upbringing and surroundings to use it for music, arts, etc but I do think think there is something physical in the brain there. I’m not a neuroscientist so I don’t know how much is attributed to genetics, hormones, etc.

          I agree with them all being functions of brain chemistry.

          Though i don’t rule out something we’d consider supernatural or spiritual because honestly i don’t really know much of anything to be definitively ruling out something like that.

          I don’t subscribe to them in my daily life, but who knows.

          The answer to most of this is “it’s complicated” and we’re basically using best guesses at this point, these guesses are based on scientific principles, but all that science really is is a semi-concrete method of defining and refining what our best guesses currently are.

          What i was trying to convey is that while all of these things could be considered “attributes”, in reality it’s much more nuanced than it seems, musical talent has many forms, as does ADD and sexual orientation/preference.

          Honestly i’d consider most brain stuff to just be unique expressions of an individual, rather than a set of labels, but that isn’t very helpful in most circumstances.

        • Senal@programming.dev
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          8 hours ago

          I don’t think understand what you are asking, would you mind adding a bit more detail please ?

          • RandomVideos@programming.dev
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            8 hours ago

            but as far as natural occurrences goes homosexuality must be considered a mental abnormality, no?

            Depends on if you consider homosexual behaviour as something unnatural.

            If the answer to the question “is homosexuality a mental abnormality” depends on if you consider homosexuality natural, that would mean that being unnatural is a condition of a mental abnormality, which, since people are born with mental illnesses and not resulted from human activity, would also exclude mental illnesses

            Am i misunderstanding something?

    • ubergeek@lemmy.today
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      11 hours ago

      Variant is probably a better choice than abnormality, if you’re asking genuinely, that is.