Words

Hotmail was one of my very first email accounts but I believe Microshaft had already bought it by the time I signed up. I think I was about 12 or 13.

I think my AIM account is still technically active even though they shut it down. Don’t know what they did with all the accounts.

fuck.com?

(Don’t click that)

I still remember when AIM shutdown for good. That was a sad day.

I mean you could always make a new account to get the welcome email and photoshop the dates and times to make it look like it’s older. I imagine the look of the email now is different from 2003, tho.

Shiiit, actually that does make sense. I remember when Gmail gave you 10 invites for new accounts and you didn’t even get them right away. You had to earn them over time. So yeah, invites were regularly sold on the message boards I used to frequent.

Reddit died 10 years ago; it’s just taken this long for it’s death throws to piddle out…

I’m only as old as I feel and me and my wrinkled-ass dick feel pretty old

My penis is pretty old at this point…

A private island

And only a trusted few would be allowed on it.

1. WaLL-E
2. Big Hero 6
3. Terminator 2

Paperhanded bitches

A couch is where you screw. A sofa is where you make love.

Ergo, a sofa is sexier than a couch.

A car on fire on an entrance ramp. Thought it was a wildfire at first until I got closer and was weirdly relieved when I saw what it was.

I see. Said the blind carpenter as he picked up his hammer and saw.

Oh, man, I love The Aristocrats joke. Used to have a DVD of that one with a lot of comedians telling their own versions of The Aristocrats joke.

I remember when something similar happened years ago when a mod of /r/AdviceAnimals got busted for promoting links to the meme site quickmeme.

Both that subreddit and that website were never the same again.

Only if you have boobs.

Nice. Office Space reference.