I go with my gf to her grandmas lake house every year, and while its relaxing and fun, I absolutely notice a change in her demeanor, I find I have to walk on eggshells around her and every other thing I say or do seems to be wrong and warrants nagging. I have confronted her about this but she seems to deny any change in behaviour is happening and just retorts with “well I told you xxx!”

Obviously her family is stressing her out but it kills me that she won’t acknowledge that, especially since I’m such a straightforward person who likes to discuss what’s going on. And that shes such a family girl on top of that. I’m planning on marrying her but i m just not sure how to discuss this particular point of contention with her first, because it’s one of the few things she’ll get actually defensive about

  • lettruthout@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    For me this would be a red flag. I agree with other comments that it’s worth an attempt to work something out, but I’d be watching how a potential life-long mate acts around others too. There’s a saying: “How she treats the waiter is how she’ll treat you in a few years.”

    • yokonzo@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Yeah idk if you read the “I plan to marry her” part.

      Keep your ‘get out while you can’ attitude out of here, this isnt reddit

      • lettruthout@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        Actually I did notice that part. I’m sorry if my warning hit a nerve. Sometimes it’s good to re-evaluate plans, even when it’s painful.