Just as the ducks at the park are free, there is also no legal requirement to answer the phone in particular way. Hit folks with a, “Ahoyhoy”, “Howdy”, “Whats good brother?”, or for the more adventurous, “Ralphs Roadkill Cafe. You kill it, we grill it.”
“Dave’s pizza and abortion clinic, your loss is our sauce” is a particularly spicy one I’ve heard.
I usually get people with: “Anons Morgue: you kill ‘em, we chill ‘em.”
In my family it was variations of “Hello, Joe’s whatever. Insert rhyme here.”
One of my favorites was “Joe’s mortuary, you stab 'em we slab 'em.”
My dad’s go to is “Joe’s Bar and Grill, this is Grill speaking”. Sometimes he’ll shake it up and answer as Bar instead
“You bag 'em, we tag 'em”
Snackbar Harry, Harry speaking
“Duffy’s Morgue, you stab em we slab em.”
I love the fact that Burns answers the phone this way. Subtle jokes like this are the reason why The Simpsons is infinitely rewatchable.
Edison deserves hate for more than that
slow heavy breathing
open mouth chewing on potato chips “Yeah?”
“TIMMY, put those down!”
[child shrieking in the background]
Angry Silence
Edison was a cunt.
So apparently the new shit spam evil calls can record the most minimal sample of your voice and then spoof it to your friends and family…
It almost seems worth saying nothing until ‘they’ say something, but then, what if they are a spoofed caller…
Oh shit. Just don’t use phones any more.
Unless I am expecting a call, such as a delivery I just dont answer phone calls, if it’s important they will call again, if it’s less important they can message me like a normal human being.
I had a friend try to use AI to mimic my voice and make me say some goofy stuff and it sounded nothing like me, so I think I’ve lucked out on that front
It has been a while though, and it’s possible the technology has progressed to be able to clone my uncloneable voice
!I was tempted to say chat member but I hate advertising or talking about that at all, so enjoy this spoiler explaining something that didn’t need explaining!<
Had to look it up, and the story is actually really interesting. Heres a great article from NPR
https://www.npr.org/sections/krulwich/2011/02/17/133785829/a-shockingly-short-history-of-hello
opens phone, “…moshi mo…” infinibonked for weebery
Ahoy hoy
Excellent
Funny thing: “Hello” was actually not a common greeting until that point.
I’ve always been curious how people greeted each other before “hello”. Did we just say “good day” and variations thereof?
Greetings, traveler.
Well met!
Greetings and salutations, pilgrim.
Well, Howdy is a contraction of “How do you do?”, hence the somewhat rarer “Howdy do!”, and Goodbye is a contraction of “God Be With You!”
I didn’t know that about ‘goodbye’! Words are fascinating, huh.
I believe “hello” itself was more of an exclamation (like “hi”, in fact) and supposedly comes from the Dutch “hollo”. Some people in the UK still use it as such, in fact.
Adios and adieu also both refer to god; I’m sure other Romance languages say goodbye similarly but I don’t know Italian or Romanian or whatever
Imagine Edison trying to patent the “hello” greeting to get royalties every time someone answered the phone.
Then the incel fanbois defending Edison, insisting he invented the term 'hello".At this point I think there are more incel fanbois overhyping Tesla, still believing he really did have perpetual energy death rays invented by Ancient Egyptian aliens
Dude was brilliant, but he was also very, very crazy… and a name that comes up a lot when I’m on the “Spirit Science and Ancient Aliens are perfectly valid methods of self-education in comparison.” side of Youtube
Not that I’m defending Edison mind you, every cent he ever gained was earned by Tesla.
Let’s compromise!
Alloy.
Or what we can agree on: HO. Omg Santa was right all along.
my go-to when im forced to answer unknown callers is “who is this?”. then i disconnect if they dont answer my question
“Who dares to disturb my slumber?”
Holy shit, the Captain had it right all along!
Yo bitch.
