I sand the surface with 220 grit then apply two coats of acrylic enamel. While the paint is still wet, pock the surface in random locations with a blunted nail and score here and there with a dull screwdriver. When dry, I coat with a thinned down acrylic matte black then wipe with damp rag to smear into cracks and expose the color. Finish with a good polyurethane.

You probably never heard of it, but I shitpost on this obscure technology forum called Lemonworld or something on things I would never admit to in public.

It’s great, I’m something of a celebrity over there.

I go for a walk alone while listening to music, usually instrumental EDM or similar, no lyrics to think about.

Wanking.

Varies on where I’m at. One thing I can do no matter where I happen to be is allow my body to lose its tension. This is a learned skill. Focus your mind on preferably a major muscle to start, and just will it to begin relaxing. I like imagining I’m becoming more liquid and that the stress I’m holding is draining away. It’s a lighter, though similar, feeling you get when your body is just exhausted and you lay down.

This is a part of a series of coping mechanisms I’ll choose from when my anxiety begins to peak.

Sharpening/polishing knives and tools. No music or videos, just the sharpening. Water stone and warm water too.

It’s cathartic to do a good job sharpening and spending the time to get a good result. Especially when you get to the buttery smooth finishing stones. They’re quiet but have, quiet, subtle sounds that are relaxing to listen to.

I remember that despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage. I think of it as the pumpkins’ version of the serenity prayer.

…you guys destress?

Fuck if I know. Closest I can think of is being alone.

Hot tub:

A video game where you and a rotating groups of strangers each pretend you’re cars that are playing soccer.

Laughter helps a lot. But if I’m consuming a ton of media, it’s sometimes better to just take a break and drink water while doing nothing else. I also have mantras about life like: “if I have my family, I’m ok”, “home can be anywhere”, “nothing in life is more important that food, shelter, water”, etc. Sometimes I worry about bills, future costs, etc. But worrying doesn’t always make it easier. A little bit of worry keeps me from ignoring finances all together. But too much worry isn’t helping. If you can free yourself from worrying about money, you’d be surprised how much weight gets lifted. I’m privileged because I have family and friends that I love. If I ever hit hard times, I know I have a home with them. Reminding myself of that keeps me from staying up all night with worry.

Playing videogames, mostly, but reading fiction is another. Cleaning open-endedly while listening to music, as well. Primal screaming.

They all work pretty well as long as I pick the right kind of videogame.

It depends.

If I am anxious or upset, vigorous exercise works best. Exhausting my body settles my mind.

If I am burned out from work but can’t relax, a drink on the porch with my husband helps to unwind.

If I cannot sleep, yin yoga is the best. Slow cold yoga with lots of forward folding.

You’re looking at it.