I’m not hip to the lingo

    • ContrarianTrail@lemm.ee
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      2 months ago

      Well not really. Those are different things. Black pill is about how you think, while incel is about what you are.

        • ContrarianTrail@lemm.ee
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          2 months ago

          Depends on which definition you go by, I guess. I prefer the literal meaning of the word; involuntary celibate. A person who is celibate against their own will.

            • ContrarianTrail@lemm.ee
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              2 months ago

              I think you’re being a bit unfair there. These attitudes often stem from their inability to form relationships. The struggle came first, and the resentment followed. They aren’t without sex and relationships because they’re inherently hateful people; rather, the hatred emerges from prolonged frustration and rejection.

              In most cases, I believe the inability to get into relationships is less about character and more about factors like social awkwardness, lack of friends, poor hygiene, unfortunate genetics, spending too much time online or gaming, etc.

              • snooggums@lemmy.world
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                2 months ago

                These attitudes often stem from their inability to form relationships.

                Because of how they think making them have awful personalities.

          • snooggums@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Nobody is celibate against their will. They might have difficulty getting into relationships, but they are also choosing not to use the services of sex workers.

        • WhyFlip@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          The term, “involuntarily celibate” is not about how someone thinks, hence the “involuntary” portion of the phrase.

      • Asidonhopo@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Arguably blackpilled folks are less problematic than incels since they have given up looking and perhaps developed a better attitude toward women (paradoxically) while incels hold a shred of toxic hope that their tradwife will swoop in and save them and that hope eats them alive. Note: I am not a scholar of either community’s worldview

        • mynameisigglepiggle@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          I had only just learned the term but I’m probably a black pill, and it’s different.

          My wife and I are having trouble, and divorce is on the table.

          When she asked about what am I going to do? I said I don’t intend to ever get into another relationship. Apparently that was more hurtful than trying to replace her… Go figure.

          I’ve had enough relationships in my time to know they are all pretty much the same, and I think I will be better off just not with anyone else. I’m sure my patterns play into these dynamics, but I try my best to be a good partner and I think I’m just better spending that energy on supporting myself in the time I have left.

          I have kids and don’t want to put any pressure on them (IE I’m careful that I don’t want them to be my emotional support), but hopefully that will allow me to feel enough connection as I descend into hermithood.