3 randomly rolled unique quality items off a table of 1000. All 1000 of them have flavor text that eludes to them having hidden stats, but actually 500 of them have no stats at all and the 500 others modify stats irrelevant to the game with things like “30% more percentages” and +0.0001% more ‽"
That’s the best part, I myself live for these things so I can ensure each item is tantalizing close to being abusable but never truly useful in any way.