this is what scares me the most, because I need the money.
I’ve left two jobs because they were toxic. I always had something else lined up beforehand though.
I left a few toxic jobs before. At one I left with my middle fingers in the air, throwing chicken nuggets from a bucket at employees I didn’t like on my way out. And then when I saw my fat manager I just went MOOOOOOO on my way out.
20 years later, still worth it. I still laugh.
When a job is toxic, I send off a job application for someplace else every evening. It makes the job I have bearable cause I feel like I’m already gone but the toxic boss still thinks they have power over me. Gives me a chuckle.
Every time I left a job to find something better, I doubled my salary as well.
Don’t quit, slowdown, make them fire you, collect unemployment and get a better job
Bad advice for a toxic workplace. That’s just going to ruin your mental health.
Still, if I can drag down the mental health of management with me, that’s a win.
Do the math. See how rational the fear is. Whatever the result, admit you’re afraid and decide if you also want to be brave and act despite the fear. Make a plan. Start working on it. Hopefully things are better on the other side, but either way that fear will pass.
Fear is a natural part of human life. Often useful, but also often not. But as long as you can manage to act despite your fear, it won’t harm you.
Ok, cortisol and stress exist, but you have bigger things to worry about.
I call it “the fear”. Being unemployed or underemployed or having the risk of no income fills me with it.
Always line something else up first. If possible, also have enough money to last 3-6 months without a job - makes things a hell of a lot less stressful. We would essentially just bank any bonuses throughout the year, and it would afford us a nice nest egg in case something ever happened. However it needs to remain untouched.
Toxic jobs really take a toll on your health, especially if you feel trapped in them. Looking for a new job is really a full time job on itself, it can be hard to do so while already working a full time job. If you feel your job is toxic you should start looking for something new right away - whether you’ve given notice or not. I’ve ended up in the hospital twice from the toll toxic jobs that I felt trapped in took on me. Another thing you can consider is diversifying your income. Ie, a “side hustle”. If you have more than one income stream you won’t be quite as trapped. You also will have something to help buffer the transition between your real jobs.
Always be looking for a new job, you never know when a new boss arrives and makes it horrible.
It scared the shit out of me, but was one of the best decisions I took, on my next job I learned to impose limits from the start.
I managed to find something very soon, but if I were in a similar position nowadays I would first find something new.
Definitely recommend looking while you still have a job like others have said. I will say, I’ve left one extremely toxic workplace in my life and I actually ended up making more money at a place that is better for my mental health. So it can definitely work out that way
I think this really depends on how you quit. If you do it on an impulse, that’s gonna really roll the dice, but if you already have another job lined up and you know the financial hit can be dampened by savings or another way, you might feel a bit safer.
I just heard that my contract can’t be renewed and it runs out in March, so I’ll have too look for something. I have enough time and I already took care of everything else so I don’t have to panic anymore, but the anxiety will be there until I secured another job I’m happy with, and I just gotta deal with that.
My current job is not toxic but it does keep me on my toes and one of my bosses I can’t get along with; he is always suspicious of me and I can’t really deal with that. I just wanna do my job and not appeal to people lol.
This might be a blessing in disguise then. Hopefully you find something you like better!
Toxic jobs drain your life, even when you leave work you’re worried about work, worried about getting fired from the toxic job…unless you can scrape together a small amount of money saved. If you’re sitting at home spending what little extra you have trying to distract yourself from thinking about work recognize that that cycle will NEVER END. Make it your mission to save every damn penny you can until you have a small amount of savings.
When you have that money, you’ll notice that you’re not quite as worried about being fired because you know you’ll be able to pay your rent/mortgage next money, you’ll have food on the table, and you’ll be able to cover the bare minimum of costs to live. The situation has now changed dramatically because you could quit tomorrow if you needed to, and you’ll be okay next month.
Working the toxic job has now stopped being a necessity, and now its a choice you make. You choose to be there. You have the power now. You can choose to quit and be gone if you absolutely need to and you’re not going to be homeless. Now you work the toxic job not for them, but for yourself. You use that job, as toxic as it is, to get what you need out of it to raise yourself to the next level of what you need to go elsewhere. You’re also not trying to avoid thinking about work because you’re not scared of it. You have some mental capacity back and can start asking yourself what you want to do next, what you need to do that, and how to get those things accomplished. Is it more school? A certification of some kind? A tool needed for your trade? Experience? Maybe you can get that experience at your toxic employer. Volunteer for what the work is that would give you the experience. You’re going to make mistakes in this new work. Make your mistakes there at the toxic employer. Gain the knowledge you need, then start looking elsewhere all.
Find your new/better employer, and make your escape.
Agree with everything else but maybe not this:
You can choose to quit and be gone if you absolutely need to and you’re not going to be homeless. Now you work the toxic job not for them, but for yourself. You use that job, as toxic as it is, to get what you need out of it to raise yourself to the next level of what you need to go elsewhere.
The stress of losing the job is gone from having the money, but the stress of having that job has not gone away. If it is ruining all your free time it’s often good to just GTFO as soon as is reasonable.
Yes, I was terrified, but I was also having a mental breakdown. I called my mom sobbing and she was actually the one who told me to quit. I was lucky that she was around because I leaned on her for about two months.
If you can, look for a job, even if it’s gig work, before quitting. I know it sucks, but finding a job will be your new activity. In the mean time, switch to the bare minimum. Take longer breaks, use sick time, etc. Don’t burn any bridges. Spend time making a really nice resume/cover letter. Maybe even see if you can use some work resources before you tell them you’re out.
If you can’t stand it a second longer, I would sit down and see what you have and how long you can last. Finding a job without a residence (in the US anyway) is difficult, so I would not do anything that would leave you homeless. Let people around you know if you have such people. Tell your friends, parents, etc., so they know that you may be needing support. Do not tell anyone from work until you’re ready to go. Make a budget. Make one for if you have literally no money coming in so you can see the worse case scenario and have that be your starting point. You may even want to look around for food banks and so forth, especially churches during this time of year. It may not be everyday, but they do dinners more often in the winter. Write them down or save them somewhere that odes not require internet/service.
Good luck. I wish you you happiness.
Yes but you can get money in many different ways so that’s nice.
Like what? Uber?
Nah Uber is a piece of shit. I meant like selling drugs or hookin’
I’ve never had trouble finding new work, so it hasn’t been too scary for me. Once I got laid off and found another job before the severance ran out but that job turned out to be a disaster and I got laid off there as well, only months later. That was definitely discouraging but a relief as well. I got right back on the horse.
However now things have changed a lot. I am much more senior and earning a lot more. Senior roles are fewer and more competitive. And the job market has been a disaster this year. It used to be that I’d get a couple of recruiter emails per week and now I can hardly get a response to any job applications I send. So yeah. At this point the financial hit terrifies me because I have a lot more at stake and I don’t know when I could get back to where I am if I left. I’m not miserable but I am unhappy as well as bored. For now I’m just dealing with it. I’m a little afraid to be “dealing with it” for the rest of my days though.
This is me right now. The job market has been so shit I’ve just keeping it together while trying to utilize my accumulated network of connections and start my own business.
Ooh starting your own business must be so exciting. I wish you all the luck with that.