Tell them straight up
“Alright well it was nice kicking it, but I’m gunna call it a night”
The end
Slap you thigh and stand up and say “Welp, it’s getting late…”, then say whatever you need to be doing.
“So!”
People that don’t recognize the thigh slap or key jingle are the fuckin worst
whelp, guess it’s time to be hitting the old dusty trail
Be direct. “It’s been great, but I have other things to take care of (or get to bed if night). See you later!”
They literally asked “oh, what do you have to take care of?” I said “I have an oil change scheduled” and they said “oh I can go with you”
“No thanks”
Look, I understand, I have social anxiety, but you just need to say what you want and move on. Of they don’t like it, then they don’t like it - who cares?
This. I think this person has just shown that it’s really important to set boundaries with them, and not worry if they like it.
Or better yet, don’t assume whether they’ll like it or not.
That person desperately needs someone in their life to tell them the truth.
“I am done hanging out. I need to be alone now”
Some people are autistic and as an autistic person myself believe me when I say there is like one in ten thousand people who will actually tell the truth, and they only do it once in a blue moon.
Be that person.
“My wife and I planned something special for tonight and I have to do my anal douche.”
Well, I am gay so… you’re not wrong.
“You’re not going to believe this, but I brought my anal douche, just in case you wanted to douche together!”
“That would be fun but after that I have to xxxxxxx for my mom, then….xxxxxx”
Imply the ‘no’ - that would be butttttt nope.
I personally say in a friendly tone “I’m sorry but I have to kick you out now because I have xxx things to do.”
Add something appreciative about their visit/your meeting like “it was great to see you”, “thanks for stopping by” or something.If you are just socially spend, you could also say that. “I hate to kick you out, but I can’t people anymore today/my social capacity is spent/it was all a bit much for me today.”
People will understand if you are direct. We all have shit to do and limited resources.
Being honest and direkt is often less weird than dancing around the fact that you want them to leave.“Let’s go to bed so these people can go home.”
Works especially well for brunch guests.
“I’m getting tired, it’s time for you to go.”
Some people are just too oblivious and need things spelled out for them. So spell it out.
My housemate in college would yell something so everyone looked and then take off his paints and say everyone get the fuck out, see you next weekend
Be direct and tell them to leave. Be polite if appropriate, but when a guest isn’t getting the message, sometimes you just need to make it simple.
Say to your wife: “Wife, we go to bed now. The guests surely want to go home as well.”
:-)
“We’re good! We’ll just hang out here!”
“Please leave”
Baby Shark on repeat.
Some great advice here. I also like this piece of verbal judo: “I have taken up too much of your time, I will let you go now. I have bored you enough with my pedantic nonsense.”
INFO: How old are they and what is their relationship to you (sibling, coworker, friend, in-law, etc)?
Early 30s and a friend.
Do they overstay their welcome all the time, maybe not even just at your house, but other friend’s houses as well?
They still live at home and hate being there.
Play Semisonic’s “Closing Time” on repeat.
You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here.
“Wellp, this was fun, let’s do it again soon!” Then get up and show them to the door.
Serve them sausages, a Danish tradition
Tell me more
To signify the end of an event, sausages are served to guests. I learned about the Danish tradition when i had an exchange student.
“The Danish way of celebrating a final event or other types of festive partying is by enjoying one of the trendiest national fast food dishes in Denmark - the “red sausage and warm bun” - evolved from the everywhere present mobile sausage charts from 1921”
When I was younger, Norwegians would often travel to Denmark and bring back bright red meat, which was not approved for sale in Norway. Now I finally realize they were just trying to make us leave.
It may help to start setting an end time. Instead of, “I can hang out at 6.” Tell them, “I can hang out from 6-8.” If they still won’t leave you might have to be firm with them. No is a complete sentence, and you don’t need to explain why.
“No”
“I’m sorry, No?”
“No”
“No what?”
“No”
“Should I leave now?”
“… … No no”
“No I shouldn’t leave?”
“No”